A few recent pics

Last weekend we headed North and spent some time on the North Shore where Kyle is from.

We went to Gloucester, MA. I had never been there B4. The Fisherman's Memorial Statue ( to the right) made me think of the movie The Perfect Storm.

I liked the 2nd picture b/c of the tiny little lighthouse statue on it. Isn't it cute?

This was a low-key week. I took Tuesday off to go visit my father which exhausted me for the rest of the week. Driving over 6 hours in one day and seeing him in such a bad state just did a number on me.

We don't have much planned this weekend which is a good thing b/c we were super busy last weekend.

B4 I close, I just want to acknowledge that a friend of mine lost her mother yesterday and I am so very sorry for her loss. Joie, you ad your family are in my thoughts and prayers!

A whirlwind of emotions

Kyle & I headed to NH this morning to see my father in the hospital. He's been in the hospital since early April and won't ever be returning home. We spent about 2 hours with him and he was so happy to see us. We bought him an ice coffee and a blueberry muffin from D&D and he was happy as a clam.

He had a magazine on his table that we looked at together. There was a little blurb on Bristol, RI and their famous 4th of July festivities. He told me that we would go together this summer when I told him I had never been to the Bristol parade. This made me sad realizing we won’t go. In fact, I will never be able to go anywhere ever again with my father as he is dying. I think at times he really thinks he’s going to get better. He will be discharged sometime in the next week into hospice care.

I cried most of the way up there but I really tried to keep it together for him during our visit. Every time I leave him I wonder if it is the last time I will see him alive. Just knowing that he won’t always be that phone call away breaks my heart. Kyle and I have had some good times w/ Dad and Barbara (his wife) over the last 9 years. We will always treasure them. No parent sets out be a failure. I’ve had my issues with Dad but the bottom line, in my opinion, is that he did the best he knew how to do and there is no doubt in my mind that he loves all his children very much. I just want him to be at peace.

When we got home from our 2.5 hour drive from seeing dad there was a beautiful flower arrangement at our door pictured above. It was from my three sisters. That brought much needed smiles to both of us.

And so it goes….

We found out today that the birth mom left the hospital today with the baby. She was apparently discharged early this morning and never contacted the agency with her decision.
We are very disgusted. We just can’t believe that this has happened again. We knew that she had 72 hours to change her mind but we expected the common courtesy of an acknowledgement from her about her choice.

Kyle seems to be handling this better than me. He insisted that we go to the beach tonight and take a long stroll. He knows how much I love the ocean. We bought subs for dinner and then walked the boardwalk. I ran into an old friend from high school and it was great to see her. We then were going to go out for ice cream but there were no parking spots so we went to the grocery store and bought ice cream.

Just thought I’d let you all know the latest news. Thanks for all the care and concern. It means so much to us!

Not a Happy Camper

The baby was born yesterday morning. I don’t know what time or anything about his size, length, etc. The BM did not notify the agency until late yesterday afternoon which the agency says is not a good sign.
When the Birth Mom coordinator Becky called the hospital to talk to the BM she indicated that her family was w/ her all day and they are really pressuring her to keep the baby. She seemed to be wavering in her decision. Becky was shocked b/c this is the first sign she has seen of any wavering.

She did name the baby Nicholas which Becky & Kyle think is a good sign. In case you did not know we were planning to name him Nicholas.

I am very worried.

The BM is having her tubes tied today and then will hopefully make a decision tonight or tomorrow. If she decides to stick w/ her original adoption plan she has to wait until 72 hours after his birth to sign the termination of parental rights paperwork. 72 hours is sometime on Saturday.

We are scheduled to leave on Monday and I am beyond worried. Please keep us in your prayers.

Big Things Are Happening!

We are leaving on Monday to Fly to Nevada to hopefully be there for the birth of our son. The BM is being induced on Tuesday. My mother is flying with us. We are scheduled to fly home on Monday May 25th, our 6th year wedding anniversary. I am worried we'll get delayed returning home b/c the 25th is also Memorial day which may set back some of the required paper work.

Flights, hotel and rental car are booked!!!

The BM has three days to change her mind from the date of his birth. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. We really want to bring Nicholas home safely :)

The Ups & Downs of Life

A close up shot of Rosie's new collar

How cute is her profile?

Sorry it has been awhile since my last post. My father has been very ill with complications from heart disease. We rushed to NH last Thursday thinking he probably would not make it through the weekend. All 5 of his children were with him and we had some great moments together. He pulled through and is doing somewhat better but according to his doctor he is at the end stage of Heart disease. We are not sure how much time he has left. He’s on oxygen and can’t get out of bed on his own. He has moments of clarity but mostly he’s very confused. It has been a real rollercoaster. I haven’t been great at keeping in touch b/c I’m just feeling emotionally drained. I’m trying to process everything and it has just been hard. Please pray for my father Bob.

On a happy note, we were matched for the 3rd and hopefully final time with a baby boy due at the end of this month. He will be born in Nevada and he is Biracial (his birth mom is African American and his birth dad is Caucasian.) We are excited but scared b/c of our last two failed adoptions. Our baby will be born in Carson City, Nevada so if any of my friends from the Sacramento area feel like taking a road trip we’d be thrilled. We will have to stay in Nevada for about a week. We are not allowed to leave the state until all the legal paperwork is completed. Please keep us in your prayers. We need all the support we can get!!!! Thanks all and we’ll keep you all posted as things progress.

A few weeks ago we bought Rosie a really cute new collar. My nieces picked it out for her in Newport. I think she looks so pretty in it :) For some reason I can't get the pics to move from the top of the page!

Adios

Keep on Keeping on!